Ringing in the New Year

Hey guys,
.
Long time no... write?

Anyway, 2009 has been interesting- interesting in the sense that this year has been a host to my gap year.

I thought I would just write about a few things I am thankful for; some of these are obvious cliches, but I mean them nevertheless.

(These aren't in any particular order except for the first two)

1) My family.
Haha yeah, I saw that one coming from a mile away too. This year, though, has brought me a lot closer to my family. I don't think I have ever been this close to them at any point in time, and I am grateful that this gap year gave me the opportunity of developing a deeper bond with those who are and will be there for me no matter what the circumstance.


2) Friends that bitch and whine about how hard it is to reach me.
I guess that's a bit too strong. Let me elaborate.

For those of you that know me even a little, it is supernaturally difficult to get in touch with me unless you are the persevering type (*cough* muffinman... *cough* emoinacloset). The difficulty arises from the fact that where many find picking up their cell and phoning a friend easy, I find fantastically difficult.

Wait no, let me rephrase that. The thought to reconnect with them really never crosses my mind. Of course, this sounds terrible, but circling back to the heart of the matter, I am grateful for he friends that have slapped (or as muffin loves to say, "beat the shit out of") some sense into me and have put me back on course to reestablishing weakened bonds. Muffin... I like the sound of that.

I'm also thankful for the friends that have stuck by me during my pathetic, little phase. I use past tense, because I feel like I'm out of the woods now. It's almost like I know what a true friendship is all about. *tear* Make friends, and then, try to keep them. A truly novel idea. Genius, really.


3) My balls.
You thought that Jesus was going to be #3 didn't you?

I do have some shame in admitting that during most of my teenage years, I invested a lot of time, with no beneficial return, into the internet-especially, Youtube.

Now after watching about three dozen videos that involve the idiotic, but oh-so-hilarious injuries to a great number of people's balls all across the world, I am so grateful that mine are still intact and going 19 years strong. I love you guys.


4) Oh right, MIT.
MIT is an institution that likens the education that it provides to drinking water from a fire hose. Now having taken a gap year and still being a freshman undergraduate, I admit that I am thoroughly scared shitless of what goes on behind the scenes of it all- the late-night cries of pain and agony over unfinished problem sets, the early-morning cries of pain and agony over unfinished problem sets, and then my favorite: "fuck it all, I am going to sleep".

However, MIT is at the forefront of science and technology. Science is where my head is at, and I am so lucky to be given the chance to go learn from the best of the best.

So to those responsible for my admission to MIT, I thank you with all my heart. And here's hoping that in a few decades, my admission officers will be the thanking me for going to MIT (probably because I will have cured AIDs, cancer, and male-pattern baldness) and bringing their institution even more fame and honor.

Lol.. bullshit!


5) Pain. Heartbreak. yada yada yada..
If we didn't have pain, I doubt we would know what happiness was. If we didn't have heartbreak, I'm not sure if we would feel lucky when we actually met that special someone.

When one door closes, another opens, right? I guess, pain would be the long ass hallways, the lack of sufficient lighting, and all the chairs and tables we bump into along the way. But fuck aren't we happy when we finally feel that door knob? We've become masters of our pain, and pain has become our guide into the future.


I'll add more if I think of them tonight.

Happy New Year everyone!

We are one year closer to the end of mankind!

Cheers,
Robocop

I guess she's over me

Who knew that when I met up with Jennie for coffee at ARC, she would drop a bombshell on me.

The conversation at coffee went something like this:

"Oh by the way how is Nitya (ex-girlfriend) doing?" (I like to keep tabs on people)
"She is doing well with her boyfriend"

(In my mind while keeping a somewhat calm demeanor, I thought to myself "WAIT?! What? Backtrack for a minute. Did she just say that Nitya has a boyfriend?")

"When did she meet him?"
"During second summer session"

"WHAT the fuck ... they have been going out for 5 months and you have not said anything about it?"
(nonchalantly)"I thought you knew"

(I am pretty annoyed at Jennie at this point, but remembering how clueless she can be, I forgave her and began to ask questions about him.)

What else did I gather about this boyfriend from my meeting with Jennie?
For starters, he goes to UCLA, which is incredibly surprising. I would have thought that after me, Nitya would have avoided long distance relationships like the plague. Good to know that I did not ruin things for her. Also he is a Junior in college, which is no surprise, she always went after the older crowd. And so far things seem to be working out with them.

But wait, why is this such a big deal you may ask? After all muffinman, your relationship with her ended a year ago.

However, what you may not know is that ever since the disaster with Anna, I have entertained the idea that things could go back to the way they were with Nitya. Of course this was a foolish idea, because of how badly the relationship ended, but it was always in the back of my mind. It gave me hope to think that there was at least someone out there for me.

Really though, it is better this way.

It is time to look towards the future for someone, because there is no one for me in the past.

-muffinman

PS: Nitya, you probably will not read this, but I wish you all the best. From what I hear, this boyfriend of yours seems to put a lot more effort into the long distance relationship than I ever did. Hopefully he treats you better than I did. Sorry for everything.

Eat All The Dicks

It was finals season, a time when people panic and suddenly realize not going to class and not taking notes for the past semester might really hurt them when they take the final exam. One of my good friends got bombarded by forty or so mass emails asking all their classmates for their notes. However, one person in his class eventually got so fed up with the begging and the whining, she felt compelled to write an impassioned, bitchy letter directed to the people who had been spamming her inbox for the past week.


To my dearest classmates,

This is addressed to all of you have been bombarding our inboxes with desperate cries for notes. If you haven't got notes by now, you are pretty much screwed for the exam. Hence, there is no point in trying to get people to send you notes by making up half-assed stories about how your notes got stolen/destroyed/eaten. If you really don't have notes, read the damn books that he assigned to us and stop being so lazy.

I think I speak on behalf of all the people who got through the final one way or another without having to beg for notes. Happy holidays guys.

Love,
Sheena


But of course, a bitch that barks is eventually going to get put down.


Dearest Sheena,

Earlier, you wrote an impassioned, well written, and relatively reasonable letter to a number of your classmates. I, unfortunately, am not a reasonable person, and I'm petty. Partly because, like you, I am finished with exams and partly because I'm a little drunk right now, I would like to respond. It may lack the prose and logic of your e-mail, but I assure you that it is written with an equal amount of passion and contempt.

You are understandably upset that your mailbox is being flooded with pleas for help, especially if you are unable to provide the materials that would resolve their problem. You can't give them what they want and, because you are perfect and everyone else is stupid and lazy, you can't sympathize with those those who don't have notes because of health issues, conflicting priorities, or experienced the unfortunate sabotage by Peruvian flute bands. So, with the rational mind of a total bitch, you thought, "Hey! Why don't I tell these people how screwed they are, explain why they're inferior, and then end my tirade with mock sweetness." Well done cunty, you really proved how difficult it is to hit the delete button so you can make room for those e-mails from Japanese business men setting up the time and place for your Christmas Eve bukkake.

I'd like to leave you with a quote from one of my favorite writers. I feel it adequately captures the sentiment of this e-mail, and it is far more inventive than anything I've managed to put into words thus far:

"Eat all the dicks. Open your bitter, miserable mouth and eat all the dicks. Stop using that mouth of yours to whine, and get started on all these dicks you need to be eating. Keep eating dicks, even at night, even on weekends. Intuition will tell you that you’ve had enough dicks, but you will be wrong: You will never have eaten enough dicks. You may say 'I don’t care what you think,' to which I’d respond, 'That’s some tough talk for someone with an acre of dicks in their mouth.'
And even when you meekly protest that they don’t measure dicks in acres, I won’t be able to hear you.
Because of all the dicks."

Happy holidays you jackass, and to the rest of my classmates who showed the moral fortitude to simply ignore the e-mails from people asking for help, rather than berate them, I congratulate you on being a far more decent person than Sheena a.k.a the Nut Gobbler. And if you have typed up your notes and it isn't too much trouble, help out your classmates. You probably don't know them and therefore don't owe them anything, but consider that it's the holiday season and who among us hasn't needed help with an exam in the past? Anyway, have a great winter break everyone who isn't Sheena, I hope you manage to get through your finals okay and that your semester ends well.

Sincerely,
Harry Burnett Reese, [a.k.a. the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup guy]


Sheena 0, "Harry Reese" 1. I believe the term is "pwnd".

-Emoinacloset

Is ASD where love happens?

Been laying off this entry for awhile.

I was talking to Katrina on Tuesday, (after she blasted my nuts with a kick during sparring earlier in the day) and she told me that she had just been asked out by a guy whom she had just met that day at the Academy of Self Defense (ASD). Maybe Katrina hit him really hard and in a daze he saw how cute she was or maybe he finds girls in sparring gear really attractive? Interestingly, this is the second time someone has fallen for Katrina at ASD, which begs the question , is this where love happens?

Thinking back, I realized that there have been a lot of crushes that went on during my time at ASD. Katrina herself fell for someone at ASD once, and one of my better friends at the gym, Will, met his girlfriend there. To top it all off, Will just got engaged to that same girlfriend a couple of months ago at ASD!

When I went in to do Jiu Jitsu, I swear I was unknowingly caught up in a guy's attempt to impress a girl. While I was working with my girl partner, this random guy, Javier, came up and just took me down. At first I thought it was all in good fun, but when Javier took the girl aside and started showing her some moves, I realized that the take down was done to impress her. Even my instructor seemed to be in on it, and at one point told him to leave the girl alone. Perhaps Javier saw me as a threat, but whatever the reason, he continued to show off on me for the rest of the night! I even got flipped once! Despite getting completely destroyed that night, I have no ill will towards Javier because I learned a lot from him.

In short, if ASD is really where love happens, does this mean that if I stay there long enough I will find my next girlfriend?

-muffinman

Will I Get Home In Time For Christmas?

On the taxi ride to the airport, I wished to Santa Claus the hardest I’ve ever wished to let me be able to go home in time for Christmas.

This was all because I left my dorm at 4:30 to try and catch a 6PM flight at JFK airport.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After celebrating one last hurrah with many of my classmates, I woke up at 3PM with packing still unfinished. It was an intense race against time to get ready to leave, including throwing away about half of my belongings and stuffing what was left into my luggage. I ended up with three huge suitcases, along with a backpack stuffed with heavy textbooks and a laptop bag stretched at the seams filled with various miscellaneous items I had managed to fit inside. I basically put everything that was in my dorm room -- clothes, textbooks, class notes, electrical wiring, a kettle, a rice cooker, and a printer -- into these bags.

I was somehow able to carry all my luggage out of my room, fit it inside a taxicab, and check out of my dorm. Unfortunately, I only had about an hour and a half to get to JFK airport, and seeing how it was 4:30PM when I left, the taxi cab driver and I were going to have to weave in and out of rush hour traffic to get there in time. We made it to the airport in 45 minutes. I won't elaborate on the details of the ride there, but I will say this -- that driver was legit.

Since it was the holidays, the airport was jam packed with people waiting to get on their flights to go to where ever they needed to go, so naturally I waited an eternity to get through the check-out line. With all the luggage I had with me, I looked like a refugee from some impoverished country who had just immigrated to New York. I had my backpack on my back, my laptop bag strapped across my shoulder, one hand steering the luggage cart and the other hand dragging my last suitcase across the linoleum floor. I am sure it was a ridiculous sight, but i was too panicked and preoccupied to really notice.

At this point, I only had thirty minutes to go before my plane left for good, and the line was moving at a snail's pace. My eyes kept darting in a triangle between the check-in line, my watch, and the display of all the flights saying whether they were boarding, arrived, or delayed. The process went something like this; move one step forward, drag my suitcases, look at my watch, look over at the display to see if my flight had left yet. Rinse and repeat. Unfortunately by the time I got to the counter, it was too late; my plane had left. I had missed my flight.

I went up to the counter dismayed, expecting that there would be no last-minute flights available for me to take. It was the holiday season, and I was sure everybody had taken up every possible seat availble on every possible plane. It was starting to look I was going to spend Christmas by myself in a clusterfuck between managing my luggage and sleeping in the airport waiting for the next flight home in the morning. Still, it didn't hurt to ask the guy if I was going to make it home for Christmas.

"Hi there, I missed my flight today. Do you think you have any other seats available heading in that direction?"
“We have one seat available on a 7PM flight to Sacramento – would you like to take it?”

Holy Shit.

Of course I said yes! Even so, there were other issues I needed to deal with.

"Alright then, let's start weighing your bags.
THUMP, 54 pounds.
THUMP, 64 pounds.
THUMP, 82 pounds..."

...all of which were over the maximum weight of 50 pounds per bag. That meant in addition to the extra bag charges I knew and was willing to pay anyways, I was going to have to pay extra overweight fees on all three of my bags. After going through everything that I did, there was no way in hell i was going to do that. I told them to wait just one moment and went over in the corner to figure out what the hell I was going to do.

My only option was to throw stuff out to make my bags lighter. I spotted a nearby trashcan in the middle of the airport, opened up my suitcases and started throwing out notes, binders, books, old clothes, anything I knew I didn't really need. It was reminiscent of a sinking ship throwing cargo overboard to try and keep the ship afloat, just so the crew can stay alive a little while longer. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

I eventually got my bags checked in with only one bag overweight; not too bad considering where I started from. I then rushed through security and raced to the gate to get on my plane to Sacramento. As I sat down in my seat, I felt a surge of relief wash over me, finally knowing for sure that I was going to make it home for Christmas.

Happy Holidays everyone -- I hope your trip wasn’t as hectic as mine.

-Emoinacloset

Snowball Fight At Stern!!!

This was part of the snowball fight we had last night, which I mentioned in the last post. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to capture Dongmin's tackle of Jim or Nicole getting owned. She was literally face-flat on the ground and people kept shoveling snow on top of her (with a real shovel). To those of you who don't study in Stern, come study here more often! You missed out big time.

-Emoinacloset

The boredom that is home

While emoinacloset is stressing over finals. Across the country, our hero, muffinman is struggling to maintain his sanity...

I have discovered that the excitement of coming home wears out after just a day, or rather I have known that since the first time I came home but I just go into denial and hope that this break will be different. It never is. My days are spent playing Mass Effect, which I just beat an hour ago before writing this post, meeting with friends, and rolling with Kevin.

The problem is not the lack of friends, as some of you might suggest, but just a lack of things to do with them. I have once again ran into that wall of what to do. Coffee only works so often before running out of things to talk about, besides, the conversations so far have been far from entertaining. People seems to have just hunkered down and taken school a little more seriously, which is great for them, but leads to a lack of interesting college stories. Hearing about extended stays at the library are just not as exciting as stories that start with "this one night I got so drunk..."

Jiu jitsu keeps me sane, right now, like it does at school, but Kevin is the only person who is willing to do it with me. Actually, I take that back, Josh wants to participate but he wakes up at 5pm so he might as well have no interest. Kevin and I roll (spar) on the astro turf at Leland, it is not ideal, but it is the softest surface that we can find. I want to get mats, however, at $25 a mat and I need at least 10 mats, I just cannot afford it.


Now that I have finished Mass Effect, which is a great game, I am struggling with what to do with my life. I guess I just have to wait for emoinacloset to get back so we can share drinking stories over drinks.

Sobriety is definitely a detriment to mental health.
Thank God, Kevin has a fifth of vodka and I actually have a source this break.

-muffinman

24 Hours At Stern And Counting...

It’s finals season and things are pretty intense. I've got three exams I need to take from now, one each on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday -- and yes, that means I'll be going home on Christmas Eve. I don't even want to think about how that's going to work out with the holiday rush, in addition to the massive blizzard that's going on right now as I type. This post will only be a short study break! I'll get back to work as soon as I finish, unlike the past two days where I've somehow managed to squander six hours playing on sporcle.com and the 10+ hours spent fucking around with other Sternies (this doesn't include the amount of time I've spend on Facebook).

For example, last night I came to Stern at 11PM determined to get some shit done for once. Instead, I stayed up all night talking and bonding with my fellow BAPers who along with me did not get shit done. It was an epic fail; I read three pages for my Economics of Global Business final in the ten hours I was there. It got bad to the point where Jim Cheng called the few minutes we actually studied “study breaks” because we took breaks from talking and then went on to study for five minutes. At this rate, I might as well be nocturnal, waking up as the sun sets and going to sleep when the sun rises.

Because of the numerous self-distractions I've put myself through, in the past 24 hours I’ve only been back to my dorm once, and that was only to grab my marketing textbook and take a shower. In other words, I’ve practically lived here the whole time. Let's just say I've unofficially moved out of Gramercy early since I'll be living in Stern for the next couple of days (although it's doubtful I get more work done here). Studying, eating, and sleeping all happen here now, and unfortunately there is no life outside of Tisch third floor for me.

At least the snow is keeping everyone here with me; no one wants to go outside and face the weather alone to go back home. It's so bad, the snow cleaner guy has just left his snow machine outside in the plaza. It's as if he was in the middle of clearing it when he screamed, "Fuck this shit! I'm going home."

I pulled all-nighters with friends, trudged around six inches of snow for a midnight coffee run having mini-snowball fights along the way, and joined everyone in the study lounge to have an epic snowball fight in Gould Plaza. Even though I'm still studying for finals, there are periods of fun that stand out in my mind. All that's left now is to finish up this semester and head back to California. I'm going to miss New York.

-Emoinacloset

Close call

This afternoon I got an email from my boss with a link to my blog post about my paycheck. She warned me about writing blogs and such about work, but was understanding about my need to express myself. Thankfully, the entry she read was positive, who knows how things would have turned out if I hated my job.

She had been alerted to the post by a Google alert, something which I used to use when I was doing Playmais stuff so I understand how easy it is to stumble upon this stuff. Basically what the Google alerts do is pull alert you by email when certain keywords appear, in this case it was the name of my work place. Despite the pseudonyms that we use, it was pretty obvious that it was me, the check mention of bluehornet was pretty damning evidence.

So be careful out there, it is too easy to accidentally stumble upon things these days. Do not mention anything that can positively identify you. I think what we have so far is pretty anonymous, let us continue to speak in generalities.

-muffinman

A third of college is over? You don't say?

Another quarter is over and thank God. This has to be my worst quarter to date due to the fact that I am struggling to get a 3.0. Not quite sure what happened, it might have been the heavy drinking every weekend, the fact that I did not take my classes that seriously, the harder classes or all of the above. Not to worry though, I have outlined a plan to go to Geisel three days a week with my roommate Kevin next quarter. Yes, I will exchange part of my social life for some better grades.

In other news, it feels weird to be back home again. It is a surreal feeling to be back, everything is so clean, there is actually food in the fridge and suddenly there is someone telling you to do stuff again (like put on a sweater). Makes me wonder how it will be when I leave for a whole year.

Hopefully, this Christmas break will be more exciting than the last one, though after finals I really do not care about anything. Sadly, emoinacloset is in New York till the 24th and I go back on the 3rd which means that I will only see him for 1 week! We have pledged to spend everyday of that week together. Be jealous.

Funny story about the plane ride back. I ran into Gupta while waiting on the plane, turns out he was on the same flight. Gupta saved me a seat on the plane and while we were talking, Gupta spots Mike Chen and signals him over, I could not help but smile at this ironic twist of events. Mike Chen and Gupta exchanged some greetings all the while I was looking up at Mike smiling. Later I told Gupta about how Mike hates me and the mysterious grudge that he has been nursing. Surprisingly, Gupta admits that he does not fancy Mike that much either. Once again, the irony.

Oh and Gupta spilled sprite on me while on the plane. I would have been annoyed with him, had I not had my jacket over my lap, saving me from soggy jeans. All is well that ends well.

-muffinman

Initiation

I woke up at 4PM today still feeling really, really drunk.

Friday was initiation for Beta Alpha Psi. I crossed and I am now officially a gold member of the Beta Alpha Psi Mu chapter! There was food, laughter, speeches, and a PowerPoint slide to showcase all the memories we made together -- but seriously, I was just waiting for initiation to end so I could go out and get schwasted.

Seeing as how this was initiation night, I was set on becoming shit-faced. This was the last time I was seeing my fellow BAPers in a long time, especially the seniors, so I wanted this to be a memorable night (or not so memorable?). Besides, I needed to redeem myself in the eyes of the upperclassmen who thought I was a lightweight.

I took two shots before I went out because I wanted to get a head start over everyone else. Then I took three shots of sake, drank whatever it was Roger slipped me (Whiskey? Bacardi 151? I'm not quite sure), and gathered my fellow power pledges to completely DESTROY the leaders in multiple rounds of flip cup (8:3 -- sorry guys, but we owned you). Then I stole someones mango sake slushie and finished that off. The survivors went off to karaoke across the street.

After an hour of karaoke, the sane people left. I was still down to drink more, but Jim and I had to take one of our fellow power pledges back home first. Apparently, while I was singing my heart out he was busy getting owned by the seniors. We eventually got him in his bed and left him to get even more owned by his roommates. One down, three to go.

On our way out Jim and I ran into Kevin. He was going to go back to bed for a good night's sleep, but we dragged him back out with us against his will; probably not the best idea on his part.

Then I finally had the Chris/Matt experience.

As soon as we got to the bar, we each had two shots of tequila. By then Kevin seemed pretty tired so it was up to me and Jim to hold the fort. We had a chug race with two more shots and a pint of beer, with the loser having to drink whatever nasty concoction the bartender was going to make for him. I definitely did not want to lose so I downed that like no other and beat Jim, leaving him in the dust with a quarter of his beer still left.

Somehow we eventually ended up on Chris's roof, where Jim and I had another chugging battle, this time with each of us getting a 40. He won that time so I guess we are even now -- keep in mind these last few drinks were all within an hour, but Jim and I miraculously made it back home in one piece. After sleeping, I spent a good part of the day recovering from my epic night.

Total count: 17 shots (A record!)

I would say today was as bad as the time I took 15 shots and then was forced by my parents to go to church hungover.

-Emoinacloset



Addendum: I saw Jim and Andy the next day, and apparently there was a note on their door in a girl's handwriting that said,

"Jim,
Thanks for using our bathroom."

At first I thought this was hilarious. In our drunken stupor, we managed to break into a girl's dorm and take a piss in their toilet. But after my initial reaction, I starting thinking -- what the hell happened after we got in the dorm? Everything was really fuzzy; I couldn't really remember what happened once we got inside. However, the following is my attempt to piece together what happened once we got into Gramercy.

Somehow we were able to get through the turnstiles in our dorm and get in the elevator. At the time, I didn't remember what Jim's room number was, but I did remember Andy's because I had already been there a few times and if my short-term memory proved correct, that was where we had pregamed for initiation. Not wanting to put Jim in my room, I decided in my drunken genius the only place left to leave him was in the safety of Andy's room. We got to his floor, but halfway there, Jim fell down because I remember dragging him around Gramercy by his feet. Unfortunately, Andy lived in a corner room so I had to drag him quite a bit.

But of course, this doesn't explain the note. The best explaination I have is somewhere between walking, stumbling, and dragging, Jim must have gotten up and said he needed to pee really badly. I helped him up and tried to get him into Andy's room as fast as I could, but like I mentioned earlier, Andy lives at the very end of the hall. Jim, not being able to wait that long, says, "I really gotta take a piss". Fortunately, I make the brilliant conclusion that since I don't ever lock my door, one of these people must keep their doors unlocked as well! Lo and behold, we broke into some poor bastard's dorm and took a piss in their toilet.

Now as for how these girls knew Jim's name... hearing all the noise they must have come out of their rooms to check what all the fuss was about. I probably said something like "Don't worry about it guys, he just wants to take a piss," and we probably introduced ourselves to be polite.

After the breaking and entering fiasco, I promptly left Jim on Andy's roommate's bed whereupon the roommate told me to move him. I later lifted Jim up from the bed to on top of Andy where I took pictures of both of them sleeping on top of each other, finally storming off to get some well-deserved shut-eye for myself.

First Paycheck Ever

On Thursday, I received my first paycheck of my life! I have never had a real job in my life, and now I am staring at my very own pay check. Never have I felt so excited or so much pride over a slip of paper.




The check! Halfway there to my netbook!

So what do you do to make this kind of money? Would be the logical question to ask.

My job consists of various duties, none of which are particularly exciting or glamorous, but are of such importance they could not do without me on finals week. Over finals week I, all I did was make the enewsletters. The newsletters go out at the beginning of every month and since I am on break till the 4th of January, I needed to come in during finals week to finish them up. Also, my boss does not know how to use the html editor on bluehornet, the web program we use for enewsletters, but I do not blame her, bluehornet is a piece of shit. In fact, bluehornet is such a piece of shit, that I use dream weaver to do all my html editing and then I import it to bluehornet, and bluehornet fucks that up sometimes too. I really have no idea how the previous girl was able to do these newsletters solely on bluehornet. She told me that it was a matter of trial and error, you needed to save and repeatedly save the edits until they stopped messing up and showed up like they were supposed to, when I heard this, I concluded that she has the patience of a monk.

Newsletters are arguably the most important part of my job, right next to creating the "tv guide" for our channels. Other duties include filling and mailing out DVD orders, logging youtube comments and most recently putting links into Wikipedia articles.

Why do you log youtube comments, you may ask. Apparently, there is a need for producers to receive feedback about their shows, so they read the youtube comments that I log on the database. We all know how constructive and inaccessible are youtube comments.

Despite some of the tediousness of the work, I like my job. The people at work are really nice. My boss is understanding and reasonable. Oh and of course the office gossip is a lot of fun.

My only apprehension about this job occurred when the old assistant left, she was treated like a family member leaving. There were hugs and sincere farewells all around. I wonder if I can really ever replace her.

-muffinman

How to Survive a Zombie Apocalypse: IN CHINESE

Yes, I have to do a presentation on zombie survival techniques in Chinese. With my limited knowledge in Chinese, this should be a piece of cake. *PAHAHAHA*

It all seems rather daunting, and frankly it sounds impossible. I’m currently taking Elementary Chinese I and each person has to talk four minutes for our oral final. I haven’t started working on the presentation yet, but I’m kind of worried about how it will turn out. There isn’t a chapter in our textbook that has a section devoted to vocabulary and grammar relating to zombies, but in the case of a real zombie infestation, I don’t think my knowledge in Chinese zombie terms will help me much anyways.

I got pulled into this last Thursday when our Laoshi gave us some time to get in groups and think about what we were going to present on. I was flipping through my textbook trying to figure out/guess what the fuck Laoshi just said, when a classmate asked me if I wanted to work together on the presentation. I said yes, thinking that we were going to work on a somewhat normal topic. Little did I know she was dead-set on presenting zombie survival skills and wouldn’t have it any other way. I balked initially, but she seemed so enthusiastic I couldn’t say no.

I should have known what her presentation topic was going to be after she asked Laoshi how to say “zombie” in Chinese, but I was too busy trying to understand what was happening with the love triangle between Li You, Wang Peng, and Gao WenZhong in the textbook to really pay attention to what was going on around me. Now, here I am trying to translate various zombie wounding/grappling/final blow moves into Chinese. *Sigh*

I need to figure out how to kill a zombie by Monday.

-Emoinacloset

Who am I kidding?

The title pretty much sums it up!

I am kidding myself if I think I am going to update this blog anytime soon. My heart is just not in it. =/

Therefore, I thought I'd write a quick message saying that from now on, Robocop will be a reader.

Hopefully, I'll be more committed as a commenter than a blogger.



Ciao,
Robocop

New boyfriend, old friend

*due to the number of complaints, here are somethings to set the record straight
1) I do not think George is Jennet's rebound
2) The views expressed on this post are mine, not Jennet's
3) This is the final edit

Guess what coffee group?!

Remember when Jennet used to think that Oliver was the love of her life and that she could never get over him? Well that just went out the window.

This all started maybe about a 3 weeks ago when I randomly visited Jennet after canceling a meet up. I know she had been talking about the captain of her badminton team for awhile, but I did not know how serious she was about him because she had been telling me that she did not want a relationship since the beginning of the quarter. So I was surprised when I went to apartment and ran into him (George). I was even more surprised when she awkwardly told me (quite loudly too) behind his back that she was going out with him. At this point I immediately took a second look at him.

George seemed awkward and quiet, he was hunched over Jennet's computer watching some video, at this point I do not think he had even acknowledged me. The way Jennet was talking to him, I judged him to be very passive too. He also apologized to me as I was leaving for hanging out with Jennet and making her unavailable to hang out with me. Yes, he is that passive. I was also struck by how not ... very ... attractive he was. Simply stated, I was looking at the complete opposite of Oliver. The irony of the situation did not escape me.

2 weeks later at coffee, Jennet told me how George was very spontaneous and exciting as well as a great boyfriend. Apparently he takes her out on great dates, that are always very fun. However, I am still skeptical after all we all know how delusional Jennet can get at times. Interestingly, according to Jennet, the way to get over somebody is to feel wanted. Who knew it was that simple.

For now I am happy for her. God knows that Oliver was a terrible boyfriend and person and that Jennet should have dumped him a hell lot earlier. I hope things work out for her this time around, and if it does not that she ends it earlier rather than later.

Oh and Jennie got a new boyfriend too, but I do not know anything about him because she never fucking talks to me or calls me back.

PS: Jennet is still single on facebook because her mom told her not to change her relationship status because it would hurt Oliver's feelings. Yes, it is ridiculous but even if it did hurt his feelings, he deserves it.

-muffinman

First Snow!

Boy, I thought it was never going to come. Just two days ago it was 60 degrees here and it was looking like I wasn't going to see snow fall before I left New York. Well, I wouldn't say it was snow -- it was more like an oreo slushee, and it only lasted for five minutes -- but still, it was reassuring to know that winter was coming back to New York and the polar ice caps hadn't melted away. Still, I suppose when the snow starts to fall, it also means it's time for the semester to end soon...

...and with that, finals. Fuck finals.

-Emoinacloset

Going to China?

I finally turned in my study abroad application, and at the last minute too. After playing 5 hours of fallout the night before,I had to leave work early to get Ashley to edit my essay (she is a great editor) because I could not get it done that night. By the time I finished all the edits on the essay, it was 3 o'clock and the application was due in an hour. So I cut it pretty close.

Now the suspense begins.

Here is my statement of purpose:
(Excuse the lame title, I was running out of time)

Statement of Purpose: A Chance of a Lifetime

When Dr. Algaze told my anthropology class that his theory on the development of writing in Mesopotamia was due to the need to keep better track of resources, it dawned on me that anthropology and economics are closely entwined. After class, I made a connection between Mesopotamia’s development of writing and China’s cultural shift - both had occurred due to favorable economic conditions. The city of Shanghai is one of the centers of the cultural shift due to China’s booming economy, which makes it a perfect case study of how culture is affected by economics. Fudan University, residing in the heart of Shanghai, provides a unique opportunity to observe the changes that are occurring in Chinese culture and study the economics that is making it happen.

Though UC San Diego has anthropology courses on China and Southeast Asia as a whole there is no substitute for personally witnessing the culture for one’s self, which is one of the reasons why the anthropology department strongly encourages studying abroad. I aim to focus my anthropology studies on Southeast Asia and the opportunity to live in China would allow me to better understand and connect with future courses. The time I will spend at Fudan will teach me how to minimize my bias and observe a culture as objectively as possible, a critical skill for anthropology. When I asked Dr. Algaze how I could see culture with neutral eyes, he told me that when my interpretations matched those of the locals, something I would not be able to do at UC San Diego, then I was on the right track. This program is my chance to truly understand a slice of Chinese culture by being able to step into the shoes of a local rather than simply a textbook or lecture.

The emerging modern art culture in China is of particular interest to me. Modern art in Asia has long been dominated by Japanese and Korean artists, but this has been changing ever since China decided to open its doors. Today, the art world is beginning to take note of contemporary Chinese artists and so have I. Since Shanghai is one of the cultural centers of China, has become one of the centers of the Chinese modern art movement. It would be dream come true to be able to witness avant-garde art happening before my eyes.

When I discussed the economic aspect of the program with my microeconomics professor, Dr. Andreoni, he pointed out that China today is more capitalistic than the United States. This made me realize that the fundamentals of economics could possibly be better observed in China than the United States due to the fact that China’s economy is a more pure free market because of fewer regulations. The course at Fudan, titled Economics of Development in an Era of Globalization will give me insight into Chinese economic policies and how they contributed to the rise China’s economic power. The course will also give me an understanding into the forces that helped shape contemporary Chinese culture. In addition, the cost of capitalism has always been an interest of mine, and I believe there is no better place than China to witness them. China’s economic boom left a lot of people behind, and judging from the growing wealth gap those people are getting left further behind. When I go to Shanghai, I want to see the costs of capitalism because I have already heard so much of the benefits from living in the west. At UC San Diego, there are no courses on the very unique economy of China. Besides the lack of Chinese economic courses, trying to acquire an understanding of Chinese economic policies in the United States, would be akin to an anthropologist trying to acquire an understanding of primate culture by studying them in a zoo.

Language is a major obstacle to my goals at Fudan, but it is something that I believe I can overcome. The only Chinese I speak is Cantonese, which is not very useful in a city that speaks either Mandarin or Shanghainese. In addition, I cannot read or write but a few words in Chinese. However, I have taken steps to ensure that by the time I arrive in Shanghai, I will be able to at least have enough mandarin to survive. These steps include investing in language software to practice during this academic year and finding a tutor for the summer. Drawing from my previous experiences in learning languages, I am confident that I will be able communicate when I reach Fudan and be fluent by the time I leave. Cultural differences in social etiquette must also be considered when learning and using a new language. In order to minimize the culture clash during my studies in Shanghai, I have enrolled in Communication Across Cultures at the UCSD extension.

On a more personal level, when I was growing up I was always told that I should be proud to be Chinese, but I never understood what that meant. This lack of a cultural identity was further compounded by the fact that my parents never celebrated Chinese holidays nor took part in any Chinese traditions. The fact that I have lived in Canada, Germany and the United States, three very culturally different countries, muddies the water of my cultural identity even further. I see this program as an opportunity to find my cultural identity and get in touch with my roots as far back as I can trace. My grandfather’s hometown is near Shanghai and to have the opportunity to see and be part of a grass roots Chinese community even just for a day, would be a life changing experience and give me a better understanding of who I am.

The experiences and knowledge I would gain from my time at Fudan would bring me closer to my dream of eventually living and working there. I want to help bridge the gap between East and West with my cultural diversity, especially in the professional world. I have already making arrangements with a friend who will also be studying abroad in Shanghai fall semester, to attend a job and internship fair hosted by New York University in Shanghai. The opportunity to intern or work in China would help establish connections and bring me ten steps closer to achieving my dream. However, personal goals aside, the main hope is that by the end of my studies at Fudan, I will have gathered enough information to, as Dr. Algaze would say, write several doctoral dissertations on the relationship between Chinese economics and culture.

-muffinman

What Is With Marketing...

Fuck you Facebook and your ridiculously addicting games!

I've shocked myself by wasting four never mind, five ok, scratch that, six hours of my life in the Gramercy study lounge yesterday night playing online Risk (yes, the board game), Youtubing music videos and Facebook stalking my friends, not to mention my uncanny ability to click one link after another. It's must be some kind of death spiral curse I've got going on here because whenever I sit down to do marketing, I can't take it seriously. I ended up blowing off my work until three in the morning when I remembered I needed to spit out a six-page marketing report for class.

While I was procrastinating, I came across some fun sites to browse through. Hopefully this will help ease the pain of finding suitable procrastinatory material.

Superhero role play + Sex = Fucking ridiculous

Look at this fucking hipster
Sometimes I wonder if these people are just dressing up for this site or if they really exist. Oh wait, what am I talking about -- I go to fucking NYU. I see people like this on the streets everyday.

Is this where Facebook comments go to hell?

-Emoinacloset