An unexpected visitor from the past

I never thought I would get this picture


Surprised is an understatement when I saw Nitya's name on the incoming call (who knew her number was still on my phone).  At the time I was in the car en route to a fundraiser and was in a conversation with the chair of the non-profit, so I could not pick up.  Later that night I called back, did not get an answer and decided to text her instead.  The next thing I know, we had set up a time for coffee.

The whole affair was very strange and surreal.  At the coffee shop, Nitya greeted me with a hug and what seemed like genuine happiness to see me.  This caught me off guard, as I was expecting a more muted greeting, after all,  how could she be so nice to me after all that I have done to her.  I was very uncomfortable when she asked me to tell her about all the girls that I presumable have been with since our breakup.  Throughout our time at the coffee shop, she was very open about everything which struck me as very odd.  Suddenly, I knew how Ashley felt after I started talking to her again after a two months and demanded that she open up.  Only this was happening to me with someone that I had not talked to for one and a half years.  So yes, like Ashley, I just closed up, became very guarded and just listened to her.

Nitya has been busy since I last heard about her.  I revealed to her about how I have been keeping tabs on her through mutual friends and that I knew about some the things that she was doing.  Interestingly, it seems that she has been doing the same to me, going so far as to have been reading my blog in order to prepare for our coffee meet up.  She told me how she had picked up modeling after being scouted by someone at a party for a fashion show.  In addition she was having a photo shoot later that week.  I heard her side of the story about what happened with Jennie at UCLA during the summer and also why she decided to transfer to UCLA.  She told me about her ex-boyfriend as well as how she had picked up drinking.  The biggest surprise, was when she told me that she was not mad at me anymore and that our relationship was an important and happy part of her childhood.

We left the coffee shop, because Nitya found it too distracting.  I found myself walking into bebe with her and shopping.  Nitya tried on various dresses and asked my opinion on them.  The whole affair reminded me of what we used to do when we were dating.  It was all very deja vu and very uncomfortable, though I tried my best to hide it.

Somehow, we even ended up eating dinner together at a nice restaurant complete with white table cloths.  Everything in my mind was screaming that this was a date.  At this point, Nitya grew annoyed at how guarded about everything I was being.  I apologized and just told her that the whole day was simply too surreal and that I would need time to open up.  When we left the restaurant, she asked for my shirt because she was cold and I gave it to her (how could I not) which made me feel even more awkward.

At the end of the night, I was more than happy to leave.  I refused her invitation to a party that she was attending and I simply walked back home, confused as to how the day played out.

- muffinman